Collected Poems of John Holmes
Holmes, John A., Jr.
You be nimble, you be quick,
But I'll be always a little thick
When the talk runs on, and on, and on
With loud political pro and con.
You can tell them, and you'll be right,
But I never seem exactly bright.
Republican and Democrat
Leave me feeling a little flat.
Next time you must elucidate
The mind that moves the electorate,
And speak at length of polls and purse.
Don't be pithy. Don't be terse.
Tell all you know, and don't omit
The doubtful states, or the ticket split,
The party chairmen's earlier lives,
The candidates' daughters, sons, and wives,
The inside dope, the public debt,
Or the cleverly reasoned election bet.
You'll be happy-that's only fair-
And I'll be happy. I won't be there.