London at the End of the Century:A Book of Gossip
a Beckett, Arthur William
1900
CALAIS OR CAIRO?
However, it is sometimes possible to carry out doctor's orders without resorting to the extreme measures conveyed in the medical commands. For instance, only the other day I had a proof of the convenient manner of obeying the spirit rather than the words of the prescription. A very old and valued friend of mine is accustomed to compare every now and again what may be termed our mutual ailments. As a rule, whoever commences the comparison has to submit to the other going one better, or rather, I should say, one worse. If I assert I have a bad headache my friend not only has a raging pain in the | |
298 | forehead, but that pain extends right down the neck. If he tells me that he believes he has incipient lumbago, I assure him that I am quite certain I am in the first stage of rapidly-creeping paralysis. |
said my friend, a day or two ago. | |
was my prompt reply, going, according to the rule of the game, one worse. | |
continued my comrade in adversity, | |
I put in again, scoring cleverly. | |
said my friend, | |
The last statements were not only interesting to ourselves, but had the additional merit of being absolutely accurate. So we determined, as the lesser commanded the greater, we would see what could be done within the inside hours of a Sunday. | |
But that necessitated very early rising, and my friend and I came to the conclusion that as we were both suffering from insomnia we ought not to think of moving until 9 a.m. I am not sure that we had any doctor's opinion to support our contention, but | |
299 | we had a pious belief that to stay in bed until the sun was ready to receive was emphatically the right thing to do. |
asked my friend, as if he were putting a conundrum full of pleasing possibilities. | |
I answered. | |
